I've been working on three different poems. Here's a rough draft of the first.

Doggerel for Democracy presents:

To the Capitalists: To Make Much of Time

Invest in me my love and see
Returns within the fiscal year
The yield is well past five percent
My equity is clear.

Take stock, my dear, of what you have
And what that may accrue
I feel you ought to know the risk
Before you say “I do.”

I’ve no insurance nor do I
Own cars or real estate
Which makes things that much easier
When it’s time to allocate.

I may not be well certified
(or have my CFA)
But I’ve got a nose to smell a find
And sense enough to stay.

Within these bonds we both shall find
A stabilizing force
Which seeks to mature year by year
In the running of its course.

We shall not index, for to base
Our fare on others’ fortunes would
Betray anxiety of taste
I hardly think we should.

Now actively we’ll strive to beat
The market and the yesteryear
And if we hold together then
We shall survive the bull and bear.

Oh, pool our funds together and,
Though we may start out beggarly
We soon shall see the beauty of
Our love compounded quarterly.


I suppose this was the inevitable result when I started reading up on investing.